The period before the studying actually starts.

By: The thirteenth monkey.

Dec 13 2010

Tags: , , , ,

Category: Life as it presents itself

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The period before you actually study my dear friends is actually the most important period of studying as it determines whether the placing of your arse on the chair will be productive or not and today this period was a period of revelation:

It starts out thus:

(I am staring at the book with the expression of a determined five year old)

Me: I will not study

Book: ………….

Me: Grrrrr, the silent treatment aye??

(My cellphone vibrates)

Text message: Hey Ikki!! Do you know what a higglehaokle is?? I was reading it on page 10,438 of the principles of neuroscience and have no idea what it is?? Help here.

Note: a higglehaokle ain’t anything medically but seriously that’s what most medical lingo sounds like.

Me: F-ck what the hell is that??! Better start studying…… HEY!! wait one second (stares at the book) no no no no I ain’t falling for your trick textbook, so you’ve got the cellphone in with this as well… ahan….

(Then as subtly as a brick crashing into a glass window it hits me)

Me: OMG the two of you!!! You’ve been sleeping together!! (stares at both cellphone and book, demanding an explanation)

Book: …………

Cellphone: ……………..

(I notice that I am starting to look pretty idiotic here so i grab the cellphone and start explaining to my textbook how his choice is an absolutely crappy one)

Me: ……. Look textbook I know that when you press her buttons she lights up, makes all this amazing amount of noise and vibrates but seriously! Have you seen her??? I mean shes all flat and she’s black and her screen size ain’t the biggest in the world. Common……

Book: ………………..

Me: Urgh…… One second.. I take my cellphone and sometimes my book to bed with me… (sound of a glass window being broken by a brick)

Me:……….. eeeeeeeeeeeekkk……… You’ve been doing it in my BED!! Do you know I sleep there AS WELL!!!

(Genuinely disgusted I throw my book and cellphone onto the floor. Cellphone breaks into three pieces)

Me: The nerve of them…. (cellphone vibrates)

Text Message: Hellloooooooooo what is a higglehaokle????

Me: (Grumbles) Guess I’ll just have to study….(picks up book and starts to study)

Me:……………………Now where did my slutty pink pencil and her pimp daddy eraser go to????

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